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Nepeta: Troll Eridan.

You decide to troll Eridan. You quickly regret it.


You decide to troll one of your friends.

Who do you troll?

Nepeta: Examine wall.

You haven’t actually Flarped in more than three seasons, but addiction is a powerful thing. Plus, you’re sure SOMEONE hasn’t heard of the exploits of the great Cerulean Snatcher.

Vriska, the nosy bitch, made a list of people you absolutely can not kill no matter what. She even made you put the name of your moirail up! As if you’d ever kill Terezi. COME ON! And you have plans for Vriska, plans that don’t involve her being dead. As the heir apparent for the Alternian Empire, your hatefriend is a valuable pawn. If you play your cards right, you can use your mutual connection to Terezi to swindle her out of her power.

Some names don’t have the correct color with them. That’s because your chalk is a gift from your moirail and no force on Alternia can make her part with her red chalk.

You also have a vague doodle of your other filled quadrant. You never claimed to be an artist!

Nepeta: Examine the rest of your block.

You keep a lot of your Cokes in a PYRAMID OF BOREDOM. But sometimes, when you’re roleplaying, you are a JUNGLE CAT terrorizing the tranquil suburbs of CAN TOWN.

Your name is NEPETA LEIJON.

You keep your block in a state of CONSTANT DISARRAY. You tend to down CAFFEINATED BEVERAGES by the dozen, especially DIET COKE, the preferred drink of highbloods. But you would never keep sodas with SUGAR. At the rate you drink it, you would be too jittery to do anything worthwhile. Besides, you are not going to die of something as stupid as diabetes!

Equally numerous are your CAT PLUSHIES. They started as a gift for your moirail, to make her stay longer at your hive. As you live a long way from her, visits are infrequent but very long so you got representations of her lusus in CALMING COLORS to tide her over. That is definitely the only reason you keep them around.

As for your other friends, they are all either AFRAID OF YOU or IMAGINARY. Feeding trolls to your lusus has really impacted your social life! But you will always have┬áRecluse, whether you want him or not. He’s always pushing you to be the best and destroy anyone in your way. Please, you already have a moirail! Actually, since you and Eridan ashed up, the CALIGINOUS TENSION between you and Recluse has been ridiculous.

So to avoid him and your empty hive, you keep up TEA PARTIES with the IMMINENTLY DECEASED. This usually just involves you kidnapping some poor troll for your lusus, getting bored, then tying them up and subjecting them to long monologues about your ancestor. Then they get fed to the spider.

Your life mainly revolves around your computer and FLARP, despite the fact that your character has become too recognizable. You used to just waltz into a clouding campaign, trick some wigglers, then boom, spiderfood. But now whispers are going out about the blue catgirl’s friends and how they keep disappearing. You want to keep your character as a tribute to your ANCESTOR but if you can’t keep your Blue Lady happy, you’ll be next on the menu.

In spite of your Flarp withdrawal, you’ve been consuming more COKE, which has made you increasingly paranoid and irritable. It also means you spend a lot of time just running back and forth to let out some energy.

What will you do?


A young troll stands in her respiteblock. It just so happens that tonight, the 3rd night of the 3rd perigee of the 3rd light season, is the night this young troll makes a big mistake.

What will the name of this young troll be?